Fall
by Gindokei
Summary: How long can you last before you fall? A little bit of Zane's thoughts after his defeat at the hands of Aster Phoenix. Second person. Short, angsty oneshot.


_Fall_

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

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_Tell me, Zane. How long can you last before you fall?_

The voice that has been murmuring in your ear since the duel began finally explodes inside your head with savage intensity. You grit your teeth, trying to ignore the screams that reverberate through your head. _Loser. Loser. You're a loser, Zane_. You watch through half-lidded eyes as he walks away, his duel disk in one hand, his deck in the other. And as irrational as it is, you suddenly hate the silver-haired boy and his mocking blue eyes.

Hate is an unreasonable emotion, you tell yourself. So you lost. Many duelists have lost before, and all of them have picked themselves back up and carried on. Remember when you defeated Jaden? He laughed it off and just asked you for a rematch sometime. Besides, it's not like you haven't lost before.

But Camula was different, you argue. You could have defeated her. Only Syrus' soul made you hold back. It was an intentional loss. You couldn't have let your little brother die for one victory.

But this. This had been different. And throughout the entire duel, that smug boy kept telling you about how it was your destiny to lose. It was difficult to believe him, because you never lose. You are Zane Truesdale, the top-ranked graduate of Duel Academy. No one expected to see you fall.

_Hey, Zane lost,_ one voice in the audience calls out.

_I want my money back,_ declares another.

_Kaiser was KO'd!_ shrieks one more in delight.

The voices build up, leaking into your ears despite your attempt to disregard them. You try not to care, but people celebrating your defeat hurts. You don't understand how people can pick themselves up after a loss and go on. How could anybody stop this free fall and make their way back to the light? How could anybody experience this intense sense of worthlessness and live?

Your head lowered, you leave the arena, anxious to be alone with your thoughts. You know that you will get a call soon, and a falsely cheery manager will tell you to do better next time, all the while concealing a threat – if this happens again, you'll be through. But you can't bear to think of that now. You can't bear to think of the future.

Once in your room, in a hotel that the manager so kindly rented out for you, you drop your duel disk by the bed, placing your deck on the side table. You go into the bathroom, surveying yourself in the mirror there, trying to ignore the defeat that makes your eyes hollow.

You seem strangely out of place in the lush room, with your stark white outfit. People found it strange that you continued to wear the colors of an Obelisk Blue, but it wasn't all that bizarre. You felt a need to keep some remnant of your past with you, and the uniform was the only thing you had apart from your deck. You continue to gaze at your reflection, finally meeting your own eyes.

One loss. One loss is all it was, and it wouldn't happen, ever again. Yet the boy's words haunt you. Could it have been that the outcome of the duel had really been predetermined? Was everything in life predetermined? If you are really a loser, is there nothing you can do to change it?

No. The boy was merely playing with your mind, trying to throw you off. And he succeeded. There is no such thing as destiny, and you know it. You tear yourself away from your defeated reflection and perch yourself on the edge of your bed, closing your eyes.

You wish for the days of Duel Academy, where you didn't have to worry about anything more than the next test. Where you had true friends who you knew would always cheer you on. Your chest aches as you think of them all – Alexis, Atticus, Jaden. Even Syrus, the little brother you never thought would be good enough, or _cruel_ enough, to be able to duel. Your jaw clenches as you open your eyes and withdraw a single card from your deck.

_Power Bond_. The card you stopped Syrus from using so long ago. The card he never felt worthy enough to use. You had always relied on it to be by your side, yet it had betrayed you. You place it face down on the bed, closing your eyes once more, fighting the tears.

Kaiser does not cry, you tell yourself. Now there is nothing left to do but move on.

Still, you sit there, your hands balled into fists. You promise yourself that you _will_ duel Aster Phoenix again, and you will win. You fall asleep in the same position, sitting up, your head nodding towards your chest. And your dreams are filled with an intangible anguish.

_How long can you last before you fall?_

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**AN: So? What did you think? Unfortunately there's so much history behind Yu-Gi-Oh! GX, I'm not sure I got all of it. And I'm not sure if Zane would ever feel so worthless, but hey, this is Fanfiction, right? Anyways, I don't think it was too good, but Yu-Gi-Oh!'s tough to write, at least for me. And in second person, present tense too! Hope you enjoy.**


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